ef68878b22398ea410ca2c19c770bce88aa967fc

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Rebuild the chucknorris fortune file with a scrapper, using 20 pages worth

NOTE: The scrapper was previously included, but due to the website it scrapped
being dead it's no longer useful. See #3642 for the code.

Co-authored-by: Marc Cornellà <marc.cornella@live.com>

Diff

This diff is truncated to protect this page.

 1diff --git a/plugins/chucknorris/fortunes/chucknorris b/plugins/chucknorris/fortunes/chucknorris
 2index e705d1c13e28c0a2ec065e0276f3e77a40ddb823..2a13b060f32fc68169cbe6bf44b1be122bb93117 100644
 3--- a/plugins/chucknorris/fortunes/chucknorris
 4+++ b/plugins/chucknorris/fortunes/chucknorris
 5@@ -1,907 +1,2544 @@
 6-Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever. 
 7+When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
 8 %
 9-Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. 
10+Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
11 %
12-Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. 
13+There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
14 %
15-The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. 
16+Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
17 %
18-If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death. 
19+Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
20 %
21-Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice. 
22+Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
23 %
24-Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. 
25+Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
26 %
27-Chuck Norris' blood type is AK+. Ass-Kicking Positive. It is compatible only with heavy construction equipment, tanks, and fighter jets. 
28+Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
29 %
30-Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian. 
31+There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
32 %
33-In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten. 
34+In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
35 %
36 There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
37 %
38-Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them. 
39+Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
40 %
41-Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face. 
42+Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
43 %
44-When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket. 
45+When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
46 %
47-There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on. 
48+Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
49 %
50-Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5. 
51+Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
52 %